Pumpkins

Ugh.

I’m up 5 pounds this week, 1 pound from yesterday.

As a daily weigher, I am both blessed and cursed to know (and not hide from) where I am in my weight loss journey each and every day. Most days I am satisfied. Today I am struggling with my brain. On the one hand, I know that my eating has been pretty good this week, my exercise has been on point so far, etc etc. So I know logically that the gain has to be a mixture of water retention, bloating from hormones, etc. But seeing that number on the scale still brings all the discouragement and fears that come with being a lifetime fat girl.

Luckily, logic is winner these days (usually), and I just gave the scale the finger, got dressed for work and fixed a smoothie. I just made up a recipe today, spinach, a banana, frozen pineapple/mango blend, frozen berry blend, and almond milk. It’s pretty good, and it felt good to be back on “plan” today. Last night was my monthly girls’ night. Each month, one of the girls in my group of friends hosts a get-together at her house and chooses a theme. Each girl who comes brings something to eat or drink based on that night’s theme. Last night was pumpkin, and the selections were SO good. I had watched what I ate all day yesterday just so I could indulge a little:

SO Good!

SO Good!

Don’t worry, I only ate about half of what was on that plate. My eyes are still way bigger than my stomach when it comes to putting “splurge” food on a plate…I am thankful that I’m slowly becoming more mindful of when I am full, and able to stop myself before sitting there and stuffing my face just because something tastes “so good.”

So, I guess the pound gain over yesterday’s weight should have been expected, IF yesterday’s weight wasn’t already higher than normal. I was expecting a maintenance of weight. So, it was hard not to be dissapointed…but I just let myself be dissapointed for a few minutes, and then moved on. Today is a workout day. I workout on my lunch breaks three days a week (well, I try to), and I am NOT feeling it today. Probably a mixture of the bad food I ate last night, and the whole “what’s the point” voice that’s trying to attack my brain right now.

It’s days like this I KNOW I need to go. In fact, I’m going to leave in about 5 minutes! Because, this:

the only workout you'll regreat is the one that didn't happen

Word.

Wish me luck, today’s workout is going to be hard…

 

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